None of this would have happened if you hadn’t lost my shoe. Yes, I know you only lost one. I still don’t know how you did that. But it doesn’t make any difference does it? What was I supposed to do with the one shoe you managed to not lose? Hop all the way to the coach stop? The pavements are covered in ice. I’d break my neck, and then I’d be saying that was your fault too.
Well perhaps I’d croak it. Perhaps it would be my last words. Don’t be pedantic, you know what I mean.
Yes you do. Isn’t it clear enough?
I mean if you, you muppet, hadn’t lost my shoe, I’d have caught the coach to Wolverhampton and we’d have made the rent.
Now you’ve found my shoe, but we lost the flat. It’s as well I’ve got two shoes again, because they’re all I have to live in.